Pyaare's wedding

Another one bites the dust. Pyaare finally called it quits and is now married. I suxors at public speaking, but ended up giving a joint speech with Jaan-e-man at Pyaare's wedding. Here it is one more time:

"This speech was Jaan-e-man’s idea – those of you who know her have probably guessed that she had the idea and then delegated the writing to someone who is “so dumb” (her words not mine). In this case me.

A wise man once told me that a wedding speech should last as long as the groom makes love. Thank you ladies and gentlemen.

To make the process of writing this speech easier, I decided to search the intarwebz - as we all know that is the source of all knowledge and truth. I searched and searched and found some really great stuff after a couple of hours. Then I realized that I was supposed to be searching for wedding speeches and not porn.

My internet searches did yield a poem that I thought would be appropriate for this occasion. Kruti its for you and its called “The Perfect Groom”:

The perfect groom is gentle, never harsh, nor cruel nor mean.
He has a beautiful smile and keeps his face clean.

The perfect groom likes children and will raise them by your side.
He will be a good father and a good husband to his bride.

The perfect groom likes cooking and cleaning and laundry too.
He’ll do anything in his power to show is love for you.

The perfect groom is sweet, writing poetry from your name.
He’s your best friend and kisses away the pain.

The perfect groom will never make you cry or hurt in any way.
And if this poem stands to be true, Vipin you really are gay.

That’s it from us – Here’s wishing the bride and groom lots of happiness and laughter in the years to come!!!"